Get Your Laugh on with these funny redneck sayings: I am as nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs. It's hotter than the hinges of hell. Your mother's so stupid, she thinks cheerios are donut seeds!

I'd rather jump barefoot off a 6-foot step ladder into a 5 gallon bucket full of porcupines than She's wound up tighter than the girdle of a Baptist minister's wife at an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast.

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Tighter than a skeeter's ass in a nose dive. Nuttier than a port-a-potty at a peanut festival. He couldn't hit the ground if he fell twice! I'm so poor if I stepped on a worn out dime I'd bet you a nickle I could tell you whether it's heads or tails.

You couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with a handfull of rice! Why, it's so cold here I'm hangin' in there like loose teeth. Duct tape is like "The Force. Redneck sayings are fun, but no list of funny redneck sayings would be complete without the ever famous you might be a redneck if sayings.

So here they are enjoy. You think a turtleneck is key ingredient for soup. Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list. Your dog and your wallet are both on a chain. You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

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You think Taco Bell is the Mexican phone book. You have ever bar-b-qued Spam on the grill. You ever cut your grass and found a car.

Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction. You think possum is "The Other White Meat". You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge. If you have a favorite redneck saying, stock market gainers and losers today quote or funny redneck slang you would like to share please do so with our add a quote form in the right column.

Here are a few redneck sayings shared with us by our guests. The ice is slicker than Vaseline on a porn star. Country Contradictions, Hillbilly Humor, Silly Sayings and lots of other stuff I have said, will say or have heard someone else say.

If you have ever said something and someone has said "Never heard that one, but I will remember stock trading asx now", please inform us all, a true smart ass can never have to many comments, rebukes, or conversation starters in their arsenal. If you were the one to say "I'll have to remember that one to use it some day" and then forgot, well here is where you can find it. No guarantees, but maybe, its just about probable, that you will most certainly probably.

You might be a redneck if your weekly mass is the prayer before the national anthem at the PBR events. It got so quite you could hear a mouse pee on cotton. If you have a collection of funny redneck sayings you would like to share you can create your own page offunny redneck sayings or quotes by visiting our sayings and phrases page.

Below are just a few redneck sayings and quotes pages created by our guests. Thank you for dhaka stock exchange newspaper this collection of funny redneck sayings and redneck quotes.

I hope you enjoyed them. If you have any favorite redneck sayings or you might be a redneck sayings you would binary option pricing matlab to share with us, I would love to see them.

Simply use the form below to share your favorite redneck sayings. Find all your favorite cheer sayings, and cheer slogans all right here in one convenient place. In any other sport, if you miss the catch all you lose is the ball.

Motivational and Uplifting cheer quotes. A good cheerleader is not measured by the height of her jumps but by the span of her spirit.

You're a certified classic at Sixty! The quotes and sayings you find on this site are free to use, however the compilation is an original work. Home Gift Shop Whats New! All Topics A-Z Authors All Authors A-Z By Women By Men All Catagories The Arts Birthdays Ethnic Expressions Food Funny Greeting Card Sayings Holidays Life Love Romantic School Spiritual Sports About About Us contact us disclaimer Privacy Policy Add a Page.

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit!

If a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his butt when he hops. Slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree. That boy is about as sharp as a cue ball. Can't swing a dead cat without hitting a Wal-Mart. That made my nuts draw up so tight you couldn't reach them with knittin' needles.

He's ridin' a gravy train on biscuit wheels. Ain't no point in beatin' a dead horse Were closer than two roaches on a bacon bit. Does a one legged duck swim in a circle? Madder than a bobcat caught in a piss fire. Heavier than a dead preacher. That's so hard to do it'd be like trying to put butter up a wildcat's ass with a hot poker!

That boy is as queer as a 3 dollar bill. Comments Have your say about what you just read! Leave me a comment in the box below. Busier then a one legged man in an ass kickin contest!!!